’d rather you continue honestly than stifle things and let it hurt you. 'cause we just need to communicate about this, I’m not going to vanish or anything like that.
(fuck!)
but I don't have such irrational fears. not anymore. not since the days became a fight, and I don't talk as much as I should. not to an end I could be satisfied with.
then you looked at me and said "I suppose if you're lost that you can re-trace your steps. don't count on me holding on to all your empty promises." it's not what I want, it's what you left me with. it's not sensible if you're embracing it. and everything that you never got a chance to say, I hope you say it. I hope you feel it.
I'd like to think that I was born astute, mindful of others and able to cope. I know it's untrue, you just don't want to tell me and ruin my hopes. but rarities and simple things, they differ only through affection, and I still thrash about for days just for moments of your precious attention.
if only you had said something. if only I had said something. if only you had said something, if only I had said anything. anything at all.
but I don't have such irrational fears. not anymore, not since the days became a fight. I'll convince myself I found my place trying so hard to make it seem like I'm doing alright.
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